Venting

Rheumatoid Disease is horrible. It doesn't like to be ignored.

I try my hardest to do everything I "used to do." I love working in the yard, and with 1 acre, there are so many things that require attention or projects that beg to be done.

I love being outside, walking, and just enjoying nature. With 132 acres of trails that call to me. Asking me to go on an adventure, it is difficult to say no.

I hate housework, but being home all day while hubby works, I am the one that needs to get it done. And I do it, willingly.

I want to help the youngest get better at batting. I feel as if I should be the one working on all aspects of baseball and/or basketball with him. Especially during summer since we are home together during the day.

We all fell in love with having a dog when we fostered & babysat 2 dogs. We adopted a beautiful pup, who is nearly full grown, and weighs about 75 lbs. That weight will only increase. We are training him to walk _with_ us, as opposed to pulling us. He doesn't mind the leash, but when he gets excited, he will pull with all his might. He also wants to play (it's a pup thing).

So....for the past 2-3 weeks (if not months), I have been ignoring pain and the warnings my body has been issuing. End of school, baseball season, range therapy, dog-sitting, landscaping, chores, dog ownership, and so much more have taken their toll. Nothing is working properly on my body.

I use sign language to get my hands working in the mornings. Generally 2-3 times through the alphabet make it easy to do what needs to be done, until the muscle stiffness/pain ease (45-60 minutes). I can no longer sign. I cannot hold a cup. Opening water bottles or jars cause enough pain for me to get tears.

Today, I had to admit that I need to stop. That for the time being, Rocket will be my only chore. And maybe other things that don't take a long time, like laundry. All of this has made me cry.

February 2018 update

I have seen my new rheum doc twice. The third time I was supposed to see him, I was shuffled to his PA without any forewarning. I wasn't really happy about it because I am essentially still a new patient. 

I have been Methotrexate free since the middle of November 2017. I stopped because I had surgery on 5 Dec 17. I was supposed to restart it on 19 Dec 17, but ended up getting sick. Then in January of this year, ended up with the flu. I actually feel better not being on it. My blood pressure has gone down (could also be because of the CPAP machine). This is really the first time in 7 or so years that I have not been on MTX. 

I was finally able to access my lab results from my first and second blood draw visits with the rheum. I am consistently on the border of anemia. The only marker that is elevated is my SED Rate. It did go up between November and the end of January, but nothing major. My RF came back non-existent and I am not HLA-B27 positive.

I still do Stelara, and the next dose is coming up in the next month. I am impressed with the medicine. My face, underarms, lower back, and other areas affected by Psoriasis are much better while I am on it.

My fatigue is still horrible. Even with the CPAP helping, there are days I just have a very hard time keeping my eyes open. Being my blood work showed I was either borderline or definitely anemic, I am going to add iron to my nightly regimen. 

Thank you for reading.